So I was reading Jessie's last post from July 1st and realized I haven't written anything on this blog for what seemed like forever. To be sure, I looked back and saw that the last time I wrote anything was in August....uh......oops? I also realized that I rarely see any of you and so this blog is so fun but I guess it's only fair that I participate and write about me. That's the thing, I hate writing about myself. I feel like my life is so boring and I have nothing to contribute so I just avoid it. I even have my own blog that I wish I wrote in more but sadly I'm no good at writing in that as well. I just need to do more fun things so that I feel like I have a purpose for writing that is exciting and interesting rather than my day to day routine. Ok now I'm just rambling and avoiding the real reason of starting this post...an update.
My life. Ok so being graduated from college was fun for a time but now I'm getting the itch to go back. I don't know if that I feel like my life doesn't have purpose/meaning if I'm not busy with school or if I feel like I'm wanting to do more. It also could be that my whole life has been school; ages 5-23. That's what 18 years straight of school. It just feels like something is missing. So, I've been considering going to grad school. Am I crazy or what? I'm thinking about going into either Recreational Therapy or School Psychology. Now the next question I always get....What are those?
So at my old job, the one I had right after I graduated that was a residential treatment center, everyday the girls wen to what's called Recreational Therapy. It's an different kind of therapy in that they aren't just sitting talking to a therapist but rather they are put in situations with other people and have to work to accomplish the task. For example, get the whole group through this hanging hula hoop to the other side without any person touching it. As a staff, I got to participate in the tasks as well and let me tell you, they were so hard! So many issues with yourself and with relationships come out when put in these type of situations. I had to put my complete trust in these girls who I didn't always know that well and some I really didn't care for. It was amazing how much I learned about myself and the importance of relationships. You can fake liking someone or ace like their best friend, but when put in situations that require trust, true feelings come out. I sometimes hated participating because of that. MY issues came out when I wasn't even the one in treatment. But at the same time, I loved it because it made me aware of things in my life that needed fixing. But overall, the time during these "therapy sessions" were amazing and it was amazing to see change and improvements in myself and the girls. They also made me interested in becoming a Recreational Therapist and work with people struggling with mental illnesses.
So School Psychology is similar but quite different from Recreational Therapy. A school psychologist works in schools to help kids who are really struggling to be successful in school--mentally and socially. They work a lot with kids who have autism to help teachers/administration/parents know what the child needs to be successful.
My plan is to apply for both programs and hope that one of them works out. So my plan for the rest of summer and this coming Fall is to work on studying for the GRE (like the ACT for grad school) and getting applications done. Super fun right??
So while I'm working on the applications and stuff, I'm also working full time for a company called Apex Fun Run. It's a leadership program that involves fitness and fundraising in Elementary schools. So basically, we go into schools and help them organize a Fun Run where the kids get pledges for every lap that they run to raise money and while we're there for the two weeks, we go into classes and teach leadership lessons to help the kids learn about how to be good leaders. We teach lessons like having a positive attitude and helping others and working together, etc. It's super fun and so rewarding and I really do love it but I can't see me doing this forever. (I think I would die from repetition.) But for now it's super fun and I really do love it! For the summer though, I'm working at the Smoot's daycare in Bountiful--glamorous job I know. It's really nothing impressive but it's been fun. I just love kids I guess.
So I've been living in Cottonwood Heights but I have to move out at the end of this month cause our lease is up and we're being kicked out. (No, we're not bad tenants, my landlord just wants a family to move in our house because there has been so much turnover with single girls moving in and out.) I'm going to be moving to Sugarhouse and live with some friends from BYU. I'm super excited for a change! Cottonwood Heights definitely wasn't what I expected but it was a learning experience for me. I struggled a lot at first being motivated to do anything, meet anyone or do anything worthwhile. I actually cried myself to sleep a lot of nights just sad about everything. I decided in the midst of my self deprecating pity party that this was a time for me to concentrate on ME and bettering myself. I felt like I hadn't done things for me. I started working out more, I read my scriptures more consistently, I kept my room clean(er) and I kept myself busy doing things that made me happy so that I didn't have time to feel bad for myself and be sad. It was amazing the change that I saw in my life and how much happier I was. Life wasn't perfect but it was so much better. Such an amazing learning experience.
When I was reading Jessie's last post, I loved the part about Declarations. It reminded me again of my treatment center job. There was one girl who had a daily declaration sheet. She struggled a lot with loving herself inside and out. She had I think 4 or 5 phrases that she said to herself everyday in the mirror about loving herself and that she was beautiful. She actually hated saying them at first but then all the girls would say them with her and she started believing them. The change in her was amazing. It didn't mean she was totally healed of her negative thoughts but she started seeing herself for who she was and the amazing person she had the potential of becoming. So Declarations are amazing! Do it! I'm going to start too!
I think that's all. Sorry for the long post. If you made it this far, I'm sorry. I'll try to post more so that when I do post, it's not so long. Love you all! Keep in touch!
-Becca
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